This time I really have no idea what I’m going on about. It appears I’ve recently become a lot more talkative than usual. I remember my teachers in kinder garden and during my early years in school saying that I talk too much. In fact, I remember a comment on my report card saying “Has a loud voice and does not hesitate to use it”. But somewhere down the line I guess I just lost all that. Any of my friends today will tell you that I’m a silent kind of person who doesn’t open up too fast. Though that still holds, interaction with certain people over the past few months has slowly made my talkative side resurface (you’ve awoken a monster!!). And now I just can’t seem to stop blabbering half the time. Anyway, that isn’t really relevant, what is relevant is the people who’ve turned me back into the more talkative person.
Whenever I’ve seen those pics on orkut or facebook which have personality tags where you can tag your friends, I’ve always been skeptical that there are actually so many different kinds of people out there. Recent experience has taught me differently. Believe me, it can be a weird feeling when you’re suddenly exposed to people who can start arguments for no reason, who won’t take advice, can stare at themselves in the mirror for hours, eat like hell or answer every sentence with, “You want to die?” But meeting people like this is really something that can’t be compared to any other experience. All of a sudden I’m in the company of people who’ve become like family to me in less than a year. There are those I couldn’t care less about, but then there are those who I would rather trade anything for than see hurt, the kind you think about before you think about yourself. And so I do tend to spend a lot of time socializing than in the pursuit of knowledge, but then I’ll justify that with the same argument I use for watching movies and playing games, that it is informative and helps me grow as a person by exposing me to new ideas!
Even today one of my classmates, who happens to be senior to me by a few years, invited us over to his place and made lunch for us as his birthday treat. Probably some of the most delicious food I’ve ever had. Definitely a more interesting activity than sitting and reading books alone if you ask me.
On an unrelated topic, I miss proper winters all of a sudden. Sure I’m dreading the heat waves that’ll accompany the summer, but we’ve had some wonderful showers and just enough cold in the past month or so to wish for a bit more. Envy all my mates here who went back home to much colder climates. Don’t really know what prompted this sudden wistfulness, but what the hey?
And I’ve gone off on another nonsense blabbering spree, which is what happens when I sit down and try to write something with nothing particular in mind. But since everyone writes about new and interesting things happening to them, writing about nothing in particular is a novel idea if you ask me.
I started off this post saying that I’ve become a lot more talkative than I used to be………see what I mean??
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
The Concept of Home
It’s funny how, if you Google the word ‘home’ and look for images, it returns thousands of pictures of nice big houses with well manicured lawns and all the stuff that comes up in our mental picture when we think of the word. But then isn’t what you would call a house? Maybe it’s because I attended one class too many on Communication Theory and the way we use words, but this got me thinking.
So after nearly five months of college, I got to spend close to a month back home in Trivandrum. But it was just around the time that I stepped onto the suburban train that was the first step on my journey back, that my overactive brain (which keeps throwing up philosophical ideas of all kinds, though rarely anything of use) started whirring. At the same time I realized that I had strange constricted sensation somewhere in my chest too, but thankfully that went away before I could start suspecting a heart attack.
Over the next twenty plus days in Trivandrum, I visited relatives, met up with my close friends, ate like crazy, slept like a pig and did just about everything college students on a break do. However some part of me always longed to be back in my hostel room. Sure, it isn’t big and I share it with two more people, but there’s something about being there that one starts to miss, and miss it I did. Stuck at home, munching away on Hide N Seek biscuits and watching movies, I started missing the people I’d met less than half a year ago, despite being with the people who’d looked after me my entire life. Then came the visit to my father’s house at Ambalapuzha. Honestly, this was the only time I appreciated being back. Even after all these years, when I took a walk through the neighborhood, I noticed that it was still the same place I used to play in as a kid, even though younger cousins had taken my place.
More people were visited, more views on life were heard, and for the first time I got to analyze a difference in the way people live, work and think depending on the place they live in, the culture they’re exposed to. It was like seeing for the first time all the wondrous things read about in books written by much wiser men and women.
So as my visit draws to a close, I finally realize some things that had always been there in the back of my mind. A better understanding of the way I see the world and the way others see it. How my take on relationships and bonds were different than many others. Though I’m sure many of my family members, and probably my parents would think all this is utter nonsense coming from someone who has a very high opinion of himself, this is the way I see it. And I must say, whoever said ‘Home is where the heart is’, was a very wise person. Because we humans aren’t really just drawn to a building or even just our families. We seek places where we feel at home. Home isn’t something we have to go to; it’s something that comes with us, it’s a place where we feel complete.
So this brings me back to the sudden brain activity and constricted chest that accompanied me onto the train to Trivandrum. And now, upon reflection, I think it’s because, somewhere, deep down, I understood that I wasn’t really going home, I was leaving it.
So after nearly five months of college, I got to spend close to a month back home in Trivandrum. But it was just around the time that I stepped onto the suburban train that was the first step on my journey back, that my overactive brain (which keeps throwing up philosophical ideas of all kinds, though rarely anything of use) started whirring. At the same time I realized that I had strange constricted sensation somewhere in my chest too, but thankfully that went away before I could start suspecting a heart attack.
Over the next twenty plus days in Trivandrum, I visited relatives, met up with my close friends, ate like crazy, slept like a pig and did just about everything college students on a break do. However some part of me always longed to be back in my hostel room. Sure, it isn’t big and I share it with two more people, but there’s something about being there that one starts to miss, and miss it I did. Stuck at home, munching away on Hide N Seek biscuits and watching movies, I started missing the people I’d met less than half a year ago, despite being with the people who’d looked after me my entire life. Then came the visit to my father’s house at Ambalapuzha. Honestly, this was the only time I appreciated being back. Even after all these years, when I took a walk through the neighborhood, I noticed that it was still the same place I used to play in as a kid, even though younger cousins had taken my place.
More people were visited, more views on life were heard, and for the first time I got to analyze a difference in the way people live, work and think depending on the place they live in, the culture they’re exposed to. It was like seeing for the first time all the wondrous things read about in books written by much wiser men and women.
So as my visit draws to a close, I finally realize some things that had always been there in the back of my mind. A better understanding of the way I see the world and the way others see it. How my take on relationships and bonds were different than many others. Though I’m sure many of my family members, and probably my parents would think all this is utter nonsense coming from someone who has a very high opinion of himself, this is the way I see it. And I must say, whoever said ‘Home is where the heart is’, was a very wise person. Because we humans aren’t really just drawn to a building or even just our families. We seek places where we feel at home. Home isn’t something we have to go to; it’s something that comes with us, it’s a place where we feel complete.
So this brings me back to the sudden brain activity and constricted chest that accompanied me onto the train to Trivandrum. And now, upon reflection, I think it’s because, somewhere, deep down, I understood that I wasn’t really going home, I was leaving it.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Pseudo Study
Yes, once again, a very obvious title. Don’t ask me why I’ve developed this habit, it’s like I’ve lost the ability to come up with imaginative titles (provided I could do that in the first place! ).
Ok so this is me sitting in the reading and study area of the college library supposedly studying for my semester exams. And as the fact that I’ve been able to type out this post clearly suggests, I have better things to do. So with everyone around me discussing portions, twirling pens and staring into laptops, I’ve decided to spend my time blogging!
I’ve had the feeling recently that this blog has become very self centred, and the lack of comments for some time has just proved that people have better things to than sit around reading my take on the world. That’s why I’ve been attempting to make it a bit lighter over the past few posts, and what better way to do that than bunk a study session? I think the weather is a good factor to blame for my unfortunate inability to concentrate on my notes . It’s not really my fault the one time I make an attempt to learn it goes cool and cloudy (In case you’re wondering, yes I’m still in Chennai).
But the funny thing is, there may be hope for the seemingly studious people around me after all. When you’re sitting in a quiet room where the loudest noise comes from huge fans that put helicopter rotors to shame, you start noticing things. And it’s now that I notice that the dude in the red t shirt has his earphones plugged in and the bespectacled guy sitting across me is discreetly texting away. Hopefully their answer papers for the sems will have their professors tearing the hair out of their noses. Bless the poor souls.
Finally, people start to yawn and stretch, water bottles and coffee cups come out, signs of just another study session. And I’ve just noticed that my ‘study partner’ has set aside World War 2 and gone online Facebooking. Maybe now is the time to convince her to take another coffee break.
I’ve just realized that this may count as another self centred post, but then, others can deal with it.
Pens have started twirling again and i see a scary diagram in one guy’s book. Looks like these people are back to work.
As for me, I’m off to enjoy the weather (sooner or later). See ya!
Ok so this is me sitting in the reading and study area of the college library supposedly studying for my semester exams. And as the fact that I’ve been able to type out this post clearly suggests, I have better things to do. So with everyone around me discussing portions, twirling pens and staring into laptops, I’ve decided to spend my time blogging!
I’ve had the feeling recently that this blog has become very self centred, and the lack of comments for some time has just proved that people have better things to than sit around reading my take on the world. That’s why I’ve been attempting to make it a bit lighter over the past few posts, and what better way to do that than bunk a study session? I think the weather is a good factor to blame for my unfortunate inability to concentrate on my notes . It’s not really my fault the one time I make an attempt to learn it goes cool and cloudy (In case you’re wondering, yes I’m still in Chennai).
But the funny thing is, there may be hope for the seemingly studious people around me after all. When you’re sitting in a quiet room where the loudest noise comes from huge fans that put helicopter rotors to shame, you start noticing things. And it’s now that I notice that the dude in the red t shirt has his earphones plugged in and the bespectacled guy sitting across me is discreetly texting away. Hopefully their answer papers for the sems will have their professors tearing the hair out of their noses. Bless the poor souls.
Finally, people start to yawn and stretch, water bottles and coffee cups come out, signs of just another study session. And I’ve just noticed that my ‘study partner’ has set aside World War 2 and gone online Facebooking. Maybe now is the time to convince her to take another coffee break.
I’ve just realized that this may count as another self centred post, but then, others can deal with it.
Pens have started twirling again and i see a scary diagram in one guy’s book. Looks like these people are back to work.
As for me, I’m off to enjoy the weather (sooner or later). See ya!
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Expression
I just feel like writing today. For some reason I can’t really explain, it’s making me think about the need to write itself. What is it that provokes us to do this simple act? Why do I feel like doing it some days and not even consider it on some other days? Sitting in a small hostel room, with a song playing in the background and the lingering freshness of rain that fell, my fingers just feel like expressing unknown feelings, despite my aching head screaming in protest.
I’ve often wondered why it is that some of us have this habit of writing, a need that doesn’t always make itself heard, but remains in the background, and you know that you’ll give in to it now and then. This has always been a very comforting habit, because it never gets in the way of anything I do, but helps me when i need it. Eventually it struck me that writing is just another form of expression, something everyone can do, just with different effects.
All of us can express our emotions in some way, some sing, some dance, some paint. What we do to express ourselves differs for each person, and that just shows the value of having something to do it with.
I’m actually considering right now if this is something worth publishing here, so if you are reading this that means my need to express won that battle.
In the end, it is not the relevance of what you write, but what it means to you that matters. A hastily scribbled note may sometimes have more value than a huge work of fiction. That is what makes this simple act mean more than to those who do it on their own free will, just like the singing does for the singers and the painting for the artists.
Unfortunately, now it’s time for me to leave the peaceful word of letters and go back to the real world. But I guess that means I will publish this after all, because it means something to me, and that’s all that matters.
I’ve often wondered why it is that some of us have this habit of writing, a need that doesn’t always make itself heard, but remains in the background, and you know that you’ll give in to it now and then. This has always been a very comforting habit, because it never gets in the way of anything I do, but helps me when i need it. Eventually it struck me that writing is just another form of expression, something everyone can do, just with different effects.
All of us can express our emotions in some way, some sing, some dance, some paint. What we do to express ourselves differs for each person, and that just shows the value of having something to do it with.
I’m actually considering right now if this is something worth publishing here, so if you are reading this that means my need to express won that battle.
In the end, it is not the relevance of what you write, but what it means to you that matters. A hastily scribbled note may sometimes have more value than a huge work of fiction. That is what makes this simple act mean more than to those who do it on their own free will, just like the singing does for the singers and the painting for the artists.
Unfortunately, now it’s time for me to leave the peaceful word of letters and go back to the real world. But I guess that means I will publish this after all, because it means something to me, and that’s all that matters.
Wake Up Sid??
Like the title suggests, this post does have to do with the movie, but I’m not sure whether it classifies as a movie review!
I watched Wake Up Sid recently on one of my usual lazy outings with friends for some afternoon relaxation. Though i went to the theatre expecting to see another feel good movie i could come out of with a more positive outlook on life, this one gave me something else.
No, no the movie didn’t disappoint, quite the opposite! But what was more was that, other than the feel good factor, it actually made me think! After watching the movie, it’s hard not to wonder if there isn’t a Sid sleeping within each and every one of us. It gives a pretty accurate description of how today’s generation (yes, that includes us!) goes about life and how we shirk our own responsibilities. It even made me understand on a deeper level why parents do the things they do, not bad for a movie of this scale if you ask me.
But the best part about the thing is how it inspires the viewer to live life on their own terms, to forget expectations and responsibilities and do what they want to do. It just strengthened my belief that going against the grain and doing what makes us happy is worth it in the long run.
So overall, another really good movie from Bollywood, showing how quickly it’s moved out of the realm of tearjerkers and sad comedies into that of meaningful, yet entertaining cinema.
And the best part? Most friends who went and saw the movie said that Sid reminded them of yours truly on some level. Though I’m not sure if that means if I’ll make it in life one day or be standing on the beach wearing my girlfriend’s kurta! Buy hey, I’ll still take it as a compliment. Not bad huh?
I watched Wake Up Sid recently on one of my usual lazy outings with friends for some afternoon relaxation. Though i went to the theatre expecting to see another feel good movie i could come out of with a more positive outlook on life, this one gave me something else.
No, no the movie didn’t disappoint, quite the opposite! But what was more was that, other than the feel good factor, it actually made me think! After watching the movie, it’s hard not to wonder if there isn’t a Sid sleeping within each and every one of us. It gives a pretty accurate description of how today’s generation (yes, that includes us!) goes about life and how we shirk our own responsibilities. It even made me understand on a deeper level why parents do the things they do, not bad for a movie of this scale if you ask me.
But the best part about the thing is how it inspires the viewer to live life on their own terms, to forget expectations and responsibilities and do what they want to do. It just strengthened my belief that going against the grain and doing what makes us happy is worth it in the long run.
So overall, another really good movie from Bollywood, showing how quickly it’s moved out of the realm of tearjerkers and sad comedies into that of meaningful, yet entertaining cinema.
And the best part? Most friends who went and saw the movie said that Sid reminded them of yours truly on some level. Though I’m not sure if that means if I’ll make it in life one day or be standing on the beach wearing my girlfriend’s kurta! Buy hey, I’ll still take it as a compliment. Not bad huh?
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
An Uncertain Return
I know, it’s been a while. But regular (or rather cheap) Internet access has been hard to come by over the eternity that has been this past month, and that’s the excuse I’ve decided to use. I’ll try and make it up to my very limited audience by offering an insight of what happens in the land where people from normal lands can’t stop sweating...
I think it’s only fair that I let everyone know what a transforming experience leaving home for the first time can be. There are people who will feel lost, uncertain, even start to regret their decisions. In a nutshell, there are people who will be homesick idiots.
Thankfully, I’m not one of them.
The last one month away from home has probably changed me more than the last 18 years of my life have. Views and opinions have changed, priorities have been thrown upside down and much experience has been gained. I guess it’s safe to say that the me writing this now has a changed perspective of the world than the me who wrote that last post before leaving.
Maybe it’s the different, faster pace of life in a metropolitan city, maybe it’s all the wonderful people I’ve met, or all the fun things we do together, but whatever it is, life sure looks a hell lot brighter now, despite that future still shrouded in murkiness lying ahead.
Despite the heat and lifeless feel of Chennai (which we the residents of good ol’ Trivandrum will hate) the place does have a certain charm that I suspect will slowly grow on me as time goes on(sort of the way Abhishek Bachchan feels about Delhi I guess :P). And it helps that our college campus is way better than most of the stuff you usually hear about from TN college returnees, because it actually has the whole multi cultural blending thing going. I never realized how much fun it is to meet people from different parts of the country (and the world, guys from China sure can play basketball!!).
With a batch that only allows a maximum strength of 25 people, teamwork assignments, professors who take us out for lunch, seniors who come to our class and hang out (in the good way) whenever they can, basketball with international students, samosas, golgappas and guitar lessons, what more could you want?
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That’s exactly what i was thinking when our tech fest ‘Aaruush”, came along. So, we the journalism department, armed with press ID cards were assigned the duty of covering the event for a special edition of the campus newspaper. Which meant we had free entry to paid and registered events including guest lectures and a late night ‘War of the DJ’s”.
I suppose the point I’m trying to put across in this otherwise rather pointless post is, despite all the doubts and uncertainties I faced about my higher education (refer earlier posts!), I’m glad I eventually made a decision I won’t ever regret. Finally rid of all the demons that haunted me during the last two years of high school, it’s that joyous feeling of being at peace with myself.
The only thing that comes close to expressing it is the line by Gandalf the Grey(or White, don’t remember who..) in The Lord of the Rings, ”The grey curtain of the world falls away, and all turns to silver glass..."
I think it’s only fair that I let everyone know what a transforming experience leaving home for the first time can be. There are people who will feel lost, uncertain, even start to regret their decisions. In a nutshell, there are people who will be homesick idiots.
Thankfully, I’m not one of them.
The last one month away from home has probably changed me more than the last 18 years of my life have. Views and opinions have changed, priorities have been thrown upside down and much experience has been gained. I guess it’s safe to say that the me writing this now has a changed perspective of the world than the me who wrote that last post before leaving.
Maybe it’s the different, faster pace of life in a metropolitan city, maybe it’s all the wonderful people I’ve met, or all the fun things we do together, but whatever it is, life sure looks a hell lot brighter now, despite that future still shrouded in murkiness lying ahead.
Despite the heat and lifeless feel of Chennai (which we the residents of good ol’ Trivandrum will hate) the place does have a certain charm that I suspect will slowly grow on me as time goes on(sort of the way Abhishek Bachchan feels about Delhi I guess :P). And it helps that our college campus is way better than most of the stuff you usually hear about from TN college returnees, because it actually has the whole multi cultural blending thing going. I never realized how much fun it is to meet people from different parts of the country (and the world, guys from China sure can play basketball!!).
With a batch that only allows a maximum strength of 25 people, teamwork assignments, professors who take us out for lunch, seniors who come to our class and hang out (in the good way) whenever they can, basketball with international students, samosas, golgappas and guitar lessons, what more could you want?
.jpg)
That’s exactly what i was thinking when our tech fest ‘Aaruush”, came along. So, we the journalism department, armed with press ID cards were assigned the duty of covering the event for a special edition of the campus newspaper. Which meant we had free entry to paid and registered events including guest lectures and a late night ‘War of the DJ’s”.
I suppose the point I’m trying to put across in this otherwise rather pointless post is, despite all the doubts and uncertainties I faced about my higher education (refer earlier posts!), I’m glad I eventually made a decision I won’t ever regret. Finally rid of all the demons that haunted me during the last two years of high school, it’s that joyous feeling of being at peace with myself.
The only thing that comes close to expressing it is the line by Gandalf the Grey(or White, don’t remember who..) in The Lord of the Rings, ”The grey curtain of the world falls away, and all turns to silver glass..."
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Leaving It All Behind
Yup, this is it…….I’m off to Chennai tomorrow, on my way to becoming a college student! As expected, my unwavering dedication to blogging and everyone kind enough to read this blog has me sitting here typing out one last post (before I leave that is!) in spite of being busy with the whole visiting temples and relatives routine.
Despite looking forward to the whole college experience, I’ve realized that I will miss Trivandrum a lot in the coming days, even though we don’t have Pizza Hut and the JBIC is having fun digging up roads all around the place, nothing changes the fact that this place has always been home to me.
And then there are all the people who make the place so wonderful, friends,family, everyone at Bvb School and even the few acquaintances here and there, you have no idea how grateful I am to have you guys around.
And of course I won’t be mentioning names here, you all should know who you are!
I know that this is kinda starting to sound like a vote of thanks at one of our school functions but hey, I can’t help it!
What all this means is that the next post may be a while, depending on how often I can get access to computers over there and whether I have time, but like I’ve said many times before and will probably say again each time I manage to post something worthwhile, bear with me and keep visiting.
So that’s all I’ve got time for right now (because I’ve got neighbors to visit and luggage to pack you see :P ).
Until next time ppl, take care !
Despite looking forward to the whole college experience, I’ve realized that I will miss Trivandrum a lot in the coming days, even though we don’t have Pizza Hut and the JBIC is having fun digging up roads all around the place, nothing changes the fact that this place has always been home to me.
And then there are all the people who make the place so wonderful, friends,family, everyone at Bvb School and even the few acquaintances here and there, you have no idea how grateful I am to have you guys around.
And of course I won’t be mentioning names here, you all should know who you are!
I know that this is kinda starting to sound like a vote of thanks at one of our school functions but hey, I can’t help it!
What all this means is that the next post may be a while, depending on how often I can get access to computers over there and whether I have time, but like I’ve said many times before and will probably say again each time I manage to post something worthwhile, bear with me and keep visiting.
So that’s all I’ve got time for right now (because I’ve got neighbors to visit and luggage to pack you see :P ).
Until next time ppl, take care !
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